Monday, April 15, 2013

April 15, 2013 4:11am EST

Wow...  I haven't had these thoughts in awhile...  A long while at that.  I thought it was gone and I overcomed it.  Maybe I've been thinking about it for awhile and now I've finally come to a point where I must face them.

Suicide.

When I first had them, I was maybe 16(emotional as fuck).  That was the first time I had them as recurring thoughts.  The first time the initial thought of suicide was when I was maybe 11-12ish...  I wasn't happy at school(picked on), home wasn't a happy place at all(pops kinda didn't know what he was doing and mom...  I honestly don't know...  'Was she there for me or him?' I asked myself constantly).

Fuck it...  Each day is tougher than the last, right?  Fuck it, fight through it and endure...

Even if the enemy is yourself

HxC:  Out

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